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moderndayruth

~ Tarot inspired essays and more

moderndayruth

Monthly Archives: October 2013

My Pursuit of the Art of Living

23 Wednesday Oct 2013

Posted by moderndayruth in Tarot

≈ 4 Comments

Tags

art, Comfort, Comfort zone, Fear, Learning, Leo Babauta, Mindfulness, Uncertainty

re-posted from zenhabits

by Leo Babauta

 

For many years I simply lived, and got by.

But in the last few years, after learning a bit about habits and mindfulness and simplicity and love, I have changed my approach to living.

Now I see living as an art form, to be studied and played with and practiced and mastered. Of course, few ever master the art of living, and I don’t know if I ever will. Probably not.

But I can pursue this art. I can appreciate it when others do it well. I can learn about it, through experiments and observation and introspection.

My pursuit of the art of living is only just beginning, but I thought I’d share a bit about this pursuit with you, my good friends.

Beginning the Pursuit
The journey begins with a single step, a wise man said, and for me that first step is simple:

Admit I don’t know.

Learning begins by emptying your cup, so that you can fill it with what you find. Emptying your cup means getting rid of pre-set opinions.

I don’t know what the art of living is, but I am curious.

And so the path is one of open hands, of curiosity and finding out.

And it’s one of bare feet, of being open and naked, willing to be exposed to life and chaos.

It’s about clear seeing, mindfulness turned to seeing reality as it is, without trying to make things rosy or conform to the story you tell yourself.

Clear seeing, naked, open hands, curious without knowing. That’s the path that I’ve found, so far.

The Art Emerges
With clear seeing, I start to see why I (and others) suffer, why we stress and get mad at each other and want more and more.

And now I can start to apply the art of living to my days.

Here’s what I practice with, imperfectly:

Compassion. Instead of being angry or frustrated, I find the pain in others, and open my heart to them. This includes compassion for myself.
Gratitude. Life is filled with wonder, and the people around me as well. I try to open myself to that wonder, and be grateful it’s there, instead of complaining.
Joyfear. Joy is an awesome thing to have, but joyfear is present in the powerful moments in life where joy and fear mix, where we’re taking chances and doing something outside of our comfort zone that both excites us and makes us face the possibility of failure. I now embrace these moments rather than avoiding them.
Not avoiding discomfort or uncertainty. When we avoid discomfort, we are limited by our comfort zone, and new learning and new ventures become impossible. When we avoid uncertainty, we only stick to what we know. But we can purposely become good at discomfort and uncertainty, by practicing in small bite-sized chunks, over and over.
Staying with the moment, even when it’s hard. This is the hardest of all. “Living in the moment” sounds wonderful, but actually staying with the present moment isn’t ever easy. Try it: with your eyes open, sit still and stay with the sights and sounds around you for 1 minute, without your mind wandering away from them. If you don’t notice your mind wandering, either you’re an experienced mindfulness practitioner, or you didn’t notice when your mind wandered.
Relationships are everything. Getting what we want, having things our way, having control, being right … these things matter nothing compared to relationships. Imagine being in your death bed at the age of 80 … will your sense of being right and in control comfort you when you have no good relationships, no one who has loved you? Put relationships first.
Not holding on to expectations & judgments. Expectations and judgments prevent me from enjoying what I have, from enjoying the simple presence of someone else in my life. I practice with noticing these expectations and judgments, and practice with holding them loosely, letting them go.
Letting go. This is the art of living in two words: letting go. It’s letting go of judgments, expectations, wanting to be right, wanting to control, fear of discomfort, fear of uncertainty, fear of failure, fear of boredom, comparing myself to others, wanting distraction, being irritated, complaining. It’s noticing when I’m holding these, and letting go. Loosening my heart’s grip on any of these, and letting go. And then letting go again. And again.
And so the art of living is a practice, one that doesn’t end, that doesn’t have a mastery level. It’s a constant letting go, a constant picking up again, and then letting go again. And falling, and getting up without beating myself up.

The art of living is the art of getting back up.

ArtofLife1

 

The Art of Life Tarot by Charlene Livingstone, published by U.S. Games Systems Inc; read a great review of the deck here: http://newpathstarot.com/wordpress/index.php/art-of-life-tarot-deck-review/

Related articles
  • My Pursuit of the Art of Living (zenhabits.net)
  • Write in your discomfort zone (5writers5novels5months.com)
  • The Art of Being Happy (mrryancgeorge.wordpress.com)
  • Three Responses to People Who Would Change You (makeshiftmusings.wordpress.com)
  • Top 8 Benefits of Living a Minimalist Lifestyle (lifehack.org)
  • How to manage your 40,000 negative thoughts a day and keep moving forward (business.financialpost.com)
  • The Comfort Zone Hoax – Why Not Taking Risks is Holding You Back (ecosalon.com)
  • the pursuit of happiness. (prosceniumarchedeyebrow.wordpress.com)

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i wish there would be following Facebook buttons, besides Like:

02 Wednesday Oct 2013

Posted by moderndayruth in Humor

≈ 11 Comments

Tags

Android, China, Facebook, First Amendment, First Amendment to the United States Constitution, Health, iLike, India, IOS, Online Communities, Social media, Social Networking, Social Sciences, status, United Nations, United State, Update, World population

1. i agree 100% with your update (whatever it is & usually it’s something highly irrelevant to the 99% of world’s population) AND i wish i thought of it myself, but then i am a non-native speaker and still couldn’t word it so neatly, so i feel tad envious too;

2. i disagree completely, more so – i almost hate you right now, but can’t remove you from friends because there is no reasonable explanation to my neurotic reaction for our mutual fb friends, thus i’ll pretend i haven’t read your status AT ALL;

3. i didn’t reply to your cry for help not because i am insensitive, but because i am in another time zone and now, 22h later,  i feel embarrassed to say anything at all;

4. i hate prolonged status updates posted late in the night, i mean, c’mmon, who has the focus for that in this ADD era?!

5. you are plain WRONG, but i am too tired to argue, so here is a passive-aggressive Like with a smirk ;

6. you post in a language i don’t speak, but you look kinda hot on your profile picture, so i Like your update & keep my fingers crossed that it isn’t about your companion being ill or something;

7. iLike your status, i really do, but it’s quite personal and i am neither sure who you are nor why i added you to friends, so i’ll pass;

8. i have no idea what you are talking about & i am too busy to read it all, but given that 78 mutual friends liked your status & commented on it Like it is!

9. despite being called ‘most anti-social invention’ by some,  a Facebook “like” is a form of speech protected by the First Amendment; “Liking” something on the social media site is a “substantive statement” being made by a user – and i don’t take those lightly, because the mere sound of the phrase is legal-power-igniting & it doesn’t matter the least that i am not sure at all what substantive statements are!

10. iLike what you are saying, it comes across as intelligent and eloquent, but i am uninformed on the topic& can’t be bothered to read extensively about it, so to comment appropriately, thus i’ll pretend that i missed this one, albeit i didn’t;

11.  i think i Like your status, but i am not sure & it’s my bedtime (i am in another time zone)

12. i like your status, but then i think your significant other won’t like yet another Like of mine on your Facebook wall;

13. you haven’t Liked any of my statuses recently & being a firm believer in Facebook reciprocity, i pass;

14. yours is a marketing douchebaggery, so no Like from me, despite the big puppy eyes you are making;

15. if i Like this, you’ll expect me to Like other stuff of yours; if i do – then you’ll invite me to Like your Facebook page, if i do that – all your Facebook friends will start nagging me to Like their respective Facebook pages and i don’t really like many of their pages, but would feel thorn apart if i liked some and wouldn’t like others and i don’t wish that kind of anguish for myself, so i pass!

facebook

Related articles
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  • I Have an Unlike Button & I’m Not Afraid to Use It !! (Week 7: Blog 1) (jwoodard73.wordpress.com)
  • Your Facebook “Likes” Are an Expression of Free Speech (blogs.smithsonianmag.com)

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